I’m in O’Neill’s right now. I may have had one or two Bombay Sapphires too many.

The R&B karaoke is so Irish.

This afternoon, en route from Kings Cliffe to Peterborough, I felt a severe urge to empty my bladder. My second in command pulled over, directing me to some suitable bushes.

At roughly mid point, several cars passed. And then a school bus stopped a few yards from my bushes. And children alighted.

In a world of Savile, Travis, Harris and Hall (did I miss anyone?) hunting, I pissed as quickly as I could and rushed back to the car.

Where my second in command was laughing.